Big Band-Aid on my forehead

[hazelchaz]

Top 10 answers to library_lynn's question "Why do you have a big Band-Aid on your forehead?"

1. Because the off-brand Hello Kitty bandages don't stick as well and aren't big enough.
2. They injected the chip there. If I don't have my id card, the vet can look up who I belong to.
3. Cut myself shaving.
4. Someone said something stupid/foolish/simplistic at the restaurant last night, and when I slapped my face with my palm I forgot I had a fork in my hand.
5. The mosquitos in Burbank are really hardcore.
6. The Group I work for requires artificial telepathy in all employees that don't have it naturally, and because of my security clearance I have to have the USB instead of the Bluetooth interface.
7. My forehead itched and I don't know my own strength.
8. I don't remember anything after signing the waiver.
9. There was a bright light, the car came to a stop, and the little green aliens told me it was time for my annual probe.
10. It's to protect my bar code tattoo while it heals.
11. That's where they're installing the Reset button.
12. She leaned in close, and whispered "want to try something new tonight?"
13. Thinking too hard. Blew out a circuit.
14. My first attempt at brain surgery.
15. All the cool kids have one.
16. I wrote something online that a friend of mine didn't like, so they stabbed me.
17. Paintball injury.
18. To cover up the spackle filling the dent while it dries and hardens.
19. I'm really not very good with chopsticks.
20. Tryouts for the new "Three Stooges" movie.
21. Vulcan Mind Melds aren't as simple as they look on "Star Trek."
22. The researchers thought they'd found Bigfoot. They tranquilized me, tagged me, and released me back into the wild for observation.
23. I tried to hug a unicorn.
24. Groundwork for my own unicorn costume. Need to make the horn next.
25. The ice maker in the freezer went berserk. First time I've been caught in a hailstorm indoors.
26. You're never too old to get an embarrassingly ugly pimple.
27. Took a shortcut through a cloud of jugglers.
28. You should see the other guy!

Comments

[hazelchaz]

29. Trying to find a stud inside the wall.

30. Having a frustrating day, but at least the wall is getting softer.

[hazelchaz]

31. I have a Band-Aid now. Band-Aids are cool.

[hazelchaz]

32. Someone botched the assassination.

33. I was hanging out in the produce section, and another shopper was checking to see if I was ripe.

[fairegoddess.livejournal.com]

Ninjas.

Alternatively, Zombies.

[hazelchaz]

36. I signed my organ donor card without reading the fine print. Fortunately, they only took a little bit of my brain and I can still anionwf mniosdvnsvh1012309-090 dkl[ck ~!@#

[hazelchaz]

shipofools999 suggests:

37. I wear the band-aid, it does not wear me.

[hazelchaz]

Kevin O'Hare suggests:

38. Mumble, gibberish, mumble, lobotomy, mumble, gibberish, mumble.

[hazelchaz]

39. I fell asleep on the patio and a smoker mistook me for an ashtray.

[hazelchaz]

40. You know, icepicks really should come with better instructions.

41. Went to a Reverse Phrenology clinic.

42. I think the best thing about hitting yourself on the head with a hammer is: it feels so good when you stop. (This applies to a lot of activities, actually.)

[hazelchaz]

Karen Garcia:

43. Who knew? Darts and beer don't go together.

[fairegoddess.livejournal.com]

44. I just got my Type II data port put in. I wouldn't snap my fingers if I were you.

[voidampersand.livejournal.com]

45. It's for your own good.

[hazelchaz]

Inspired by Steve Blossom:

46. Rehearsing for a "V-8" commercial.

library_lynn:

47. A vampire with bad aim.

48. missmea and I were beta-testing "Facebook Live" and she "poked" me too many times.

[hazelchaz]

49. Exhaust port for brain farts.

50. First day on the golf course as a caddy-in-training.

51. We really shouldn't store the bowling balls loose, on the top shelf.

[hazelchaz]

52. The paperboy missed.

53. The paperboy didn't miss. Memo: give him a better Christmas bonus this year.

(both from library_lynn)

[voidampersand.livejournal.com]

54. My daughter's name is Athena